- Buy as much wrapping paper as you need. It’s only paper. Use the tissue, too.
- Use only paper and plastic goods for your parties. (Especially the plastic table cloths and cups.) Don’t worry about the landfill. It’s the holidays!
- Send cards to EVERYONE. Have them printed, labeled and bulk mailed. They’ll be well received, just like the ones you get from the bank and the dry cleaner!
- Drive everywhere and often. Might as well drink, too. Then you’re multitasking.
- Buy buy buy. It’s good for the economy. And more “things” make us happy.
- Eat eat eat. Like it’s your last meal! It could be!
- Drink drink drink. It’ll enhance the entire holiday experience. Guaranteed!
- Review your grudges and resentments. Sure as hell you’ll run into “him” or “her”. Might as well be prepared. Also see #7.
- Nap early and often. No exercise necessary. Napping IS exercise in some cultures.
- Remember: gravy covers a lot of sins. And cigarettes are good for you.
Feel free to add your own tips in the comment section …
